" the empty stare "

---

and who even knows what's going on really? we just o our best and organize and implement as best we can. right?

no amount of outside influence can really be more true than the decisions we make in our heart, until they are shifted.

and i'm constantly shifting.

contradictions, contradictions, contradictions, contractions, i stand altered at all times.

in the best ways, in the worst way, and in either case, and wherever i travel along the spectrum, in the least i remain true, honest, confident, and curious.

tonights homework:

know that you are doing your best, and day-dreaming can still be categorized as active planning. ha!

---

 

" keep the lanterns lit "

---

we talk of the past when it's calm and cups of hot tea are present. biscuits, cookies, snacks of a crumbly sweet nature abound, and everyone looks wistfully off at stars in the distance signifying memory and nostalgia.

the fires are stoked in my body, the winds billow and bluster throughout my respiratory structure, a vast ocean sways in my heart, the cellular bodies of my sinews all flex in unison.

all elements present. shared silences wrap about us like the cloak of the night sky,

---

 

" on display "

---

nothing to hide, all out in the open. arms back, palms out, fingers spread like shattered glass.

can you see all of my good intentions, how i am doing my very best, and where my loyalties lie?

i've done my absolute, my utmost, my finest moments yet to become.

skirting along the nadir of all of my past efforts, i can only promise to be better, do better, and continuously improve.

so forgive my silences, my fits of frustration, and my open wounds. we are all so beautifully flawed, and i have you within my heart's crosshairs..

---

 

" evergreen "

---

steady ship upon wavering waters, you remain steadfast and true.

your open sails catching the winds as they furl and wisp in dark nights.

cast out from the homeland shores to unfamiliar seas, you remain honest and vigilant. no errant striders will find you alarmed or ill-prepared.

through storm, gale, or unexpected denizen of the deep, you keep your golden heart intact and unyielding to scorn or prone to charmed trickery.

we follow the lead of this vessel to all destinations, and believe in you wholeheartedly to the beautiful salvation or inevitable ruin of us all.

tonight's homework:

craft your ship of hopes and desires, then set out into the world filled with confidence, bravery, and a thermos of delicious soups...and maybe a first-aid kit.

---

 

" cutting a path "

---

away all doubters, begone all disbelievers, off with your negativity!

we are the makers, the creators, the rump-shakers. those beloved interpreters of the moments in between the edits. these are the new colors which veered from the primary and secondary.

participate, appreciate, pontificate, investigate. we are open, raw, vulnerable, and up for scrutiny or nit-picking. we've prepared for many years of our lives, and although the message and intent are always evolving, nothing can discount the expression and validity.

approach and behold something you've never seen before. be astounded, moved, altered, shifted, and transfigured. life is too short to remain the same shape, and there's so much yet to accomplish.

tonight's homework:

instead of judging and passing off, create something and share. having a voice is difficult, but one of the most beautiful sounds.

---

 

" art echo echo "

---

thank you so very much and big ups to heather hart for the opportunity to participate in this latest iteration of BARTERTOWN at the brooklyn museum. it is an event which i have covered and documented in year's past, but never participated in.

what a joy and humbling wonder, the chance to connect with the public, fellow artists and makers, and really test the quality of my artistic mettle. all those moments of self-doubt, procrastination, idea-forming/idea-rejecting, and finally honing in on a version of a template worth pursuing.

each time i had a person at my table it was amazing. so many simple things, eye contact, the willingness to be a part of something new and strange, and yet allow yourself to be open and vulnerable. i owe so much to the participants, and hope they too had a great experience.

to know your voice has been heard, and those interactions become golden, unique, singular, and ultimately cherished, it moves the feeling of appreciation from articulate to a flurry of feelings and emotions washing over your entire being in the most alluring and glorious of ways.

and i hope to finish this mini-project by the end of the year, and perhaps continue and extend it in the future.

tonight's homework:

make something. you may break something, but take great care and in the least make the effort. the rewards are nigh endless and will sustain you long after the moment of creation has elapsed.

---

 

 

" it's in the details "

---

one of my favorite things about having my eyeglasses prescription updated is the clarity. the magical disorientation of clear vision is something that those with great vision simply do not experience.

there are distortions and refractions, reverse reflections and fragmentations, blurrings, bendings, bowings, compressions, chromatic aberrations, and a duplicitous amount of constant readjustment.

after a while, those experiences wane until your brain and body are in alignment with the tool, and your vision is returned to "normal." but what a magical time is the in-between; what wondrous ponderous beauty lies  inside of such visual malformation.

to know of two worlds, the one of supreme and pristine clarity, and one of luscious billowing softness. it is one of the strangest most backwards "gifts" i experience daily. and i feel that with each new pair of eyeglasses, i can not only readjust my vision, but also focus in more deliberately the entirety of my life's intent.

tonight's homework:

write a song, sing a song, share a song. feel free to express yourself.

---

 

" finding the time to find the time "

---

be a little more selfless and give rather than seek to receive. it's a hard to task to balance out your own personal desires alongside giving up something.

sometimes it's just giving a helping hand, or time to help someone out, or making a meal for someone. it can even be as brief as calling and reconnecting with someone you haven't talked to in a while, family or friends, and making sure that they are okay.

we all want to believe that someone out there has us in their thoughts and in their heart. take care of yourself by taking care of others, and you will never be lacking in wealth.

tonight's homework:

http://youtu.be/Js0rKmv-0Iw

---

 

" unknown metric "

---

i can hear you through the static, just barely enough to make out the intent. there's hope and desire in those squawks and ethereal peals.

i'm finding the radio silence of my heart intersecting with your scrambled codes. the deafening roar of a message not transmitted.

there's nothing i want more than to decrypt those jumbled transmissions, and find my way through to you.

tonight's homework:

make a true connection, and mean it.

---

 

" a birthday before all else "

---

celebrate!

birthday times come around whenever you most and least expect it. has it been a whole year? did i accomplish all that i set out to accomplish? did i make a difference in the world for being in it?

most obviously a time for reflection and reevaluation, gaining a year on your tree of life is another annual treat (other than new year's) where we have the opportunity to take a moment. really take a moment to see if we are living our lives to the fullest, right up to the brim, cup runneth over.

so whether it is your birthday or a friends...or a strangers, celebrate celebrate celebrate! it has been and continues to be an absolute pleasure to have you here with us, and i very much look forward to everything you will do in the time which follows and continues to evolve.

HBD.

---

 

" the long sigh "

---

flexing past all the weight of the day. passing off responsibilities and finding your stride towards the open doors.

the sun dips behind some errant clouds and reintroduces itself to the wide open arms of the horizon.

everything good all the time rings throughout my heart. the resound of the bright bells lighten my step and energize my resolve.

we're on the streets amidst the flurry of legs and strangers in coats. evening rush begins, and the possibilities are endless.

---

 

" glimmers "

---

every moment at ease, each answer perfect.

everything in its place. billie holiday crooning and shining in the background.

feet shuffle the wooden floors in unison. glasses clink and dishes clatter.

taking in the moment and easing back into the booth,

i find glimmers of overwhelming beauty in the every day.

tonight's homework:

seek out a moment of truth.

---

 

" dark matter "

---

beneath the waves, there is a dampening around my body, and as i sink into the depths, i can hear only whale songs and the shifting of tectonic plates rumbling.

pressure building and the clutch of a deep pressure grips tightly as everything inside me is crushed and implodes. just a flicker of memories scattered in my final moments in the dark matter surroundings.

warm days, bright beams emanating from shared moments, smiles, laughter, those moments when everything fit into place. the moments where everything made sense, had a purpose, sent me reeling, and put me completely at ease.

in the release of the last breath of air, just before my skeleton shatters, i awake in my room gasping for air. the day has broke, the sounds of cars passing in the street mingle with children laughing in the adjacent schoolyard. i inhale in a new day and prepare to change my life forever.

tonight's homework:

clean your room before you are buried by the inconsequential. save the goods, purge the scraps.

---

 

 

" a new arc "

---

just around the bend,

and through the hushed whispers of a clear afternoon wind,

brushing through the long lean shafts of extended brown reeds,

i spotted the most curious silver fish,

ululating in the afternoon sun, and

vastly huddled together in close numbers.

---

 

" end of the day "

---

closing the set down with all worries of the past week put behind. about to emerge onto the street, read world. open schedule filled with infinite possibility.

sunshine hanging low at the golden hour; the shadows lean heavy along the walls. the deep black contrasting rugged textures of concrete and peeling paint.

just one more moment and my feet are out the doors. just one brief second, and i'm flying and soaring.

tonight's homework:

make the most of the weekend. it's been such a long time since the last one, and its tenure so fleeting. make each moment count!

---

 

" karaoke as therapy "

---

how do you feel? is your hair in a good state? are you tense from the pressures of the day? are you anxious, relaxed, how does your skeleton feel? are you happy?

taking a moment to confront your physical Self helps me to remind myself that despite all f my perceived inherent flaws, these are the hard-won trophies of years of life; these are the beautiful results of living.

each day i try to do something good for myself, my people, my career, my pale of residence, and for the world at large. i don't always succeed in these daily one-offs, but i make the attempt to stick to my abilities.

we try so hard at times to get away from ourselves, to escape our overbearing overwhelming thoughts, away from aggression, from desire, from pain and anguish. of course it is never easy to ease through states of being, but in taking care of realistic goals in the pursuit of larger broader ones, eventually things begin to happen.

the insurmountable tasks lessen in its endlessness, sadness lifts, hope reawakens and your entire life energy refreshes. i hope you will give it chance. perhaps pick one activity that makes you feel amazing. one that heals and elates, one that brings yourself out of your funk, and releases all the woes in your day-to-day. this is the healing power of simple pleasures.

tonight's homework:

the next time you catch your reflection in the mirror or a reflective surface, just linger there for a moment. give it some time to reintroduce yourself to yourself. see into your strengths and count your blessings aloud; you will find that they vastly outweigh your supposed faults.

---

 

" the further you go "

---

you travel so far from yourself that you feel you are newly alone on the planet. whether solely in your mind and actions, or in physical geolocation. we all have to get away from it all once in a while, and isn't it odd, perhaps your neighbor is doing exactly the same.

and then you meet strangers in a far off land, and they're familiar with where you're from. they may not entirely know you, but they know the streets you have walked, the foods you enjoy, and the isms that are your isms as well.

when you try to escape yourself, you eventually realize that you will always be present in your mind, in your body, and that realization is integral to learning, growing, and expanding your world.

tonights homework:

plan an excursion, near or far, and make a checklist of things to do, things to see, and things to eat.

---

 

" nervous energy "

---

confronted with the perceived limitations of my Self, face flush blood hot and shivers sent all throughout the nervous system. lights rack in and out of focus behind my eyelids as i reel back into my mind.

the world goes dark and devoid of sound.

how long have i been here in this dense black? why do i find myself unable to move and escape?

and then lights begin to form as if a great distance away, glowing and growing in intensity, then dissipating. then i begin to hear sounds of my hands, the room and how it reverberates, the wind outside the windows, and the streets below.

coming more and more into the present and away from the dim dreamscape, the glowing lights grow warmer, brighter, until they fill up all the blackest crevices and obliterate all shade and shadow.

my eyes open and i am renewed into the clear light spilling in through the curtains. they flutter as if the energies and beams pushed them aside to gain entrance.

tonight's homework:

face a fear outright, and experience all the heat of confrontation. then move through and past it. you too can be filled with an unknown strength.

---

 

" someone will see you "

---

i found myself in the middle of a rainstorm on the island. sheltered by this tarps overhead in the bluster and throttle of the winds, you could see everyone was ill-prepared. all about me was bermuda shorts, tee shirts, and communal groans.

then to my left and only a short distance away, i could see the bus ticket attendant calm, collected, and beaming a warm light from her minuscule shelter of a booth. everything close at hand, and utilitarian, i imagined that she had been there all day long, and how she had to deal with tourists more than locals.

knowing that my self-imposed challenge is to approach those individuals who catch my attention, i made my way over to the booth through the raindrops. and what a beautifully contained bottle of an exchange followed.

i could tell she was intrigued and hesitant at the same time, but when you encounter an open mind, an open heart, and a willing for adventure, those brief moments extend into eons and time eventually becomes irrelevant.

we spoke, i requested, she agreed, and that harrowing storm (apparently the first in 4-6 months!) passed through my cares as if my shoes were never soaked through. now returned to my home base, and may miles between us, i am endlessly pleased to have had an opportunity to connect with this gem.

may you be ever happy, warm, have shelter in times of bad weather, and sunshine throughout the long legs of your life. many thanks.

tonight's homework:

take a chance on taking a chance on your bravery and see how it turns out.

---

 

" ten miles out "

---

when you're far away from everything and everyone, it's easy to feel lonely. but mostly you have to remind yourself that you are merely alone. it's more realistic and less poetic, but at least it's a truth that can put your worries at rest.

when you're short of breath and the daylight turns kaleidoscopic, it's easy to think that this is the end. the world around you goes silent, and you feel light-headed and heavy-bodied. you have to remind yourself that you are loved, your body is as strong as it is, and perhaps the strongest it has ever been. and you will get through this.

when you're ten miles out, and the frequency dips in and out, there is no wifi, and all about you is radio silence, there is no need for communication technology of the modern era. look to the trees and how they are rooted to the earth. look to the skies and how they fill your lungs and water your garden. look to your parents, siblings, loved ones, and fellow man; they are all about you, in your heart, and the ones who will find you in your most remote hours.

tonight's homework:

take a few moments to reflect of the past weekend. take care to look at those positive engaged times where you felt joy, elation, love, and happiness. use these memories to get you through the week to come, and in those moments when you need to be lifted up most.

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