" to the hard work and it paying off "

---

it's going to happen really really soon. not because of faith or karma or anything to do with wishes, dreams, hopes and fairy dust.

you've got to find the time for reality checks throughout the day, week, month, year, life, and when you find yourself at certain crossroads, you begin to realize that you are the one who will make it all happen for you.

elbow grease and tenacity, followthrough and determination, grit, special sauce and the knowledge that you have every capacity for a certain success. these are the base elements of getting on and pushing through.

so i'm going to make the goals of this year manifest, and it will be great no matter how insignificant or widespread. it will have such a weight because i will have put something new into the world, and it makes the collective human experience so much better to know that you are a valid and unique part of it.

tonight's homework:

make. it. happen. (and don't be too proud to ask for help if it's needed)

---

 

" the sweetest returns "

---

back in town and the leaves shake from the trees. golden, paper-thin, floating on damp breezes. the season is altered as summer's last dregs linger and loiter in the wings.

looking forward to the shuffle and dirt paths, the produce come to fruition, the bounty, the pomp & the symphony of it all. i see you though the corner of my eye, through a clear window, waiting with a curl of your smile beaming and shining.

many thanks for the warm welcome back into your loving arms. i long to linger in your embrace, and dream of those warm colors in your evolving spectrum.

---

 

" making great strides "

---

in each new day a promise of great adventure. we have to make the attempt at paralleling our daily activities with the flow of this linear existence. whether that's in making detailed plans down to the minute, or no plans at all, this life can shift and ebb drastically and without provocation.

i take a meticulous care to do my best in all situations; a little semblance of control in the name of punctuality, a little chaos and randomness in the name of spontaneity. you can never really know what lies ahead, but the revelry in the anticipation is so exciting, so blissful.

even quiet moments can make great strides.

so, i am venturing forth and seeing a little more of the world, in the hopes of seeing a little more of myself. i have a template, but as always nothing is certain. and i am eager to embrace that curiosity with open arms.

farewell, farewell, until we meet again.

tonight's homework (for the next two weeks):

wish someone luck on their journey, however short, however long. there is a great comfort extended to those who know someone is on their side rallying for them, and will miss their company. take care of the ones you love.

---

 

 

" hurtling towards all discovery "

---

not just dreaming it will happen, willing it. taking the time, making the necessary steps, and really playing an active role in the realization of those dreams. this is on the docket for today.

when you find yourself in front of something so massive, so overwhelming and seemingly insurmountable, it is easy to turn your head away to take a moment. it takes a great courage to defy the notion to slink away from, to cower under and separate from that sensation.

so let's make a solid go of it together. you and i, all of us, together. we are continuously forming a mighty ensemble of truth-seekers, creatives, doctors of the soul, healers, and activity partners. these will be your collaborators and supporters. the ones to lift you up and propel you forward.

you do not need to make a single sound to be brave, you just need to make the decision to follow your heart. the result of which will be nothing short of a lived life.

(i will be away for a couple weeks, looking to the horizon and channeling my own sense of adventure and discovery. i hope for you all that in these days to follow, you find your own sense of wish-fulfillment. the very best of luck to all of us, and i will see you soon.)

---

 

" leaning into the wind "

---

all the pieces in alignment, the skies, the atmosphere, the earth on its axis.

we're continuously realizing our place in the universe, and we scramble for meaning on the surface of this planet.

i am continuously discovering, rediscovering, redefining, and finding different sources of happiness. in the people, the natural world, our stories and performances. it's all so much and perfectly overwhelming.

i long to exist in this ether as long as i can, sifting and engaging.

and such a joy to know that in each day, we've a renewed opportunity at actively redefining ourselves, our work, our connections and friendships. and in these interactions, we are better able to redefine our trajectory.

---

 

" details in the shadows "

---

after ten days of long nights on little sleep, i am very proud to announce that my website remap is ready to go live. right. now.

as stated before, this process for me has been more about taking a real look at what drives my interests in the past five years. most of the work has been pared down and re-categorized, cleaned out, shifted from back to front, and front to back.

we spend a lot of time on so many other people's sites, that when it comes to our own work, and what we both love to create and share with the world at large, it has to be something reflective of your Self, of your interests, and images representing specific deconstructions of the people and places around us.

in each moment for me, i feel that i have a beautiful collaboration on the horizon. in each project i delve into, i feel those luxurious shadows extending their lengths across the plane of exposure, and my vision and happiness finds its focus.

please feel free to browse, share, comment, and participate.

welcome.

tonight's homework:

find someone you appreciate, and give them some of your support. it feels great to give and to receive.

---

 

" chance to travel "

---

why not travel!? it's one of the very best ideas, an absolute guaranteed adventure, however short the duration or minuscule the distance.

up is down, left is right, front is back,, in is out, and sleep becomes less important. i'm days away from taking a short jaunt to a far-off isle in seek of the greater understanding. although we travel great distances, there is also a great satisfaction in being able to return home with such insight. 

it opens you up, redefines our meter for near-everything, forces you to wrestle with new cultures, people, traditions, public transportation, foods, sociocultural isms, and so much more!

tonight's homework:

sally forth, head out and abroad, seek foreign destinations and marvel in faraway lands. it is the quickest way to exit swiftly from your comfort zone, and elevate your life experience.

---

 

 

 

" a clarity "

---

making new friends and keeping the old, developing my kinships beyond the fold.

how silent the world gets when you feel as if you are alone. and truly, you are never alone in this world. at least one person has your back; a family member, a friend, a stranger even. even if it's just one person, you can find a common ground while you both explore your empathy.

these old friends and how much they are diamonds gleaming in the shadowy gray blur of those less-than day-to-day times. they for me become lighthouses and home base, safety net and open arms, lingering eye contact and extended hug.

all those pop songs, the sickly sweet crooning, the tales of lights in the darkness, the tales of you-got-a-friends, these ring so true even if a little saccharine. the sentiment is spot on. the sense of closeness and intimacy is pitch perfect, and i am here for you.

tonight's homework:

when you're missing someone or feel out of sorts, remember that you could go outside of yourself, out of your boundaries of loneliness, and seek out your peeps. they'll always have your back and be there for the hard times if you're down, and the up times when making merriment. what a comforting thought!

---

 

" living the dream "

---

i wish i could find the image of the electrical synapse firing when an idea shifts from particles, molecules, and atoms into the light bulb illuminating. or the feeling of a love forming out of affinity, or the moment we fall into REM sleep and how the pulses in the brain become images.

whatever the visual expression of those instances, ideas form, love is fallen for, and dreams exist. we find so much meaning in our own experiences, and when we recount those experiences to others, it is astounding how much is parallel and how much is amazingly fresh.

how can we as a species lived for so long on the planet, and still not understand these shifts? why we dream, why the brain works like it does, and how at all falling in love exists as a social occurance.

we could delve deeper or merely at the surface, and it wouldn't make it any less affecting, any less powerful or meaningful. we come to crossroads every day and cross boundaries of what we deem to be impossible.

at times we astound ourselves.

when you share your experience with another, the story of your life extends, and sometimes inspires others to do more, push harder, be better, expand their mind, and enhance the quality of their life. we can touch the lives of others, their hearts, their minds, bodies, souls. it all.

what will you do today?

tonight's homework:

remind someone in your life who made a difference, that your life is better for knowing them. i bet they would appreciate it.

---

 

" navigation of Self "

---

listen in close to those gems who instill the wonderment and awe of living your artwork. every experience an inspiration, every reflection an opportunity to fine tune, and each interaction a chance at renewal.

i spend a fair amount of my time existing between in a state of niggling doubt and jittery confidence. the portion of my time where it blurs and intersects reminds me how there are no pure states of being, but there can exist pure states of intention.

when you seek for support or salvation in the gleaming beacons in the world, they can show you a way. this is not the only way, but it does give you a glimpse into a certain version of the way that has worked for some on their own path.

if you remain interested in the notion that you yourself has the same infinite potential as your peers, heroes, and contemporaries, then there is a great hope that your artistic output will mesh with your sense of reality. you can make this a life of creativity, not solely crafting together project or works of art, but becoming the embodiment of leading an artistic life.

tonight's homework:

though you are a work of art, set time aside to know your surroundings and the wider world around you. perspective is a powerful tool for the development of your vision.

---

 

" this is where we find ourselves "

---

amidst the perhaps oversaturation of both ire over and news regarding being in your thirties, you have to remind yourself that each generation is going through this right now.

teens are talking about their issues, those in their 20's are discussing their particular opinions, woes and social insights, and you begin to see that everyone has a point of view.

i find myself nearing the center of my 30's, and all the news from friends and family around me is of rediscovery and checking off boxes. babies and puppies feature prominently, first homes & mortgages, premium gadgets, gear, and bric-a-brac, a return to childhood loves and collecting through the filter of financial near-stability.

it's no wonder that you could feel the collective social pressure of your entire generation, looming about you and weighing heavily like a massive wave from the open open.

but, everything in due time. be happy for those fortunate enough to afford their interests, for those who are growing their family outward, or finding themselves, or having an emotion at all.

we're always going to be at a point in our lives where we are actively trying to better ourselves, figure it all out, and deconstruct the obstructions to happiness. remember that you are in good company, and we are all here for you, even when you want to quit all social media, move out of the city and to the mountains, and begin a llama farm with no electricity...which is a fine option as well.

tonight's homework:

stay cool. stay cool forever.

---

 

" BFFF "

---

the completion of a circle, and the end of the notions of being ever forgotten. may all people have in the least one person to call their friend. a person in which you can share feelings and secrets, someone to give you the gift of reflection and discovery, and one to teach you those life lessons which help to shape your daily existence.

a variation of that sense of intensely overwhelming giddiness you felt as a child running the most fast laughing and giggling, hurtling towards a destination unknown in such a state of elevated elation, you feel you will explode in a blinding glow of sparkles or throw up and pass out.

though we find ourselves detached from those we hold the most dear, there are the most beautiful arrays of invisible strings, pulled taut and underneath the most detectable scrutiny, could be seen to shimmer and flex with the strengthening of our connections.

endless friendship, leaping, soaring, to the ends of the earth and back! through space and time, through bother and wit, through silences and distances. this is the love we seek and the ones we've found.

tonight's homework:

you are not alone. tell your BFFF that you love them, and miss them, and will cook them dinner, then watch a moooooovie soooooon!

---

 

" elements of "

---

elmhurst park afternoons and familiar strangers. common experiences and the discovery of character.

a person at rest and on display, not a performance yet the knowledge of being seen.

how to arrange the elements of so that everything you appreciate will be in frame? how to show that you appreciate and respect the willingness and opportunity?

lovely hat atilt on a perfectly matched expression, body at rest and posture casual elegant.

i see the scene, i see the person, i see through the broad strokes and the shapes, and how it all comes together is a form of magic.

everything in its place for a time, and now this moment becomes both fact and memory.

our time so brief, the regard so enduring.

tonight's homework:

remember to thank profusely your collaborators. they are indispensable and endlessly interesting subjects. be grateful and spread curiosity.

---

 

" cool kids "

---

nothing like noticing those peeps which define a sense of cool. never without anything less than a sense of Self, coupled with confidence and a twinge of self-effacement.

you know the friend in your circles who fit the bill, and they will always have the "it" quality about them. neither rain nor sleet nor snow will diminish their particular quality of light. 

whether outwardly robust or discreetly, this person will always inhabit and reside at the edges of coolness. and they do not require entirely your approval or understanding.

tonight's homework:

the best part about notingcing this quality in your friends, is that perhaps you are overlooking yourself, and they all think that you are the cool kid. better believe it.

---

 

" the reminder "

---

we are doing our best. our absolute best, aren't we?

there are those wide stretches of time in between where we don't see each other, find ourselves in conundrums, pickles, creative droughts, and struggles. those times where we find ourselves apart from our peers and supporters, we have to remember that we too have the skills the flourish beyond our own expectations.

the in-between times are also "real life" happening, but it's always a welcome occasion to meet in person and recalibrate. trust in yourself, put your best foot forward, and all of the outcomes will develop as they may.

tonight's homework:

there is a certain beauty in the at-times unknown; embrace it and see what happens.

---

 

" a shifting of newness "

---

dear all,

i would like to announce that i have been working on introducing new content on my site.

i find myself the sort of photographer who mostly finds the most satisfaction and reward when working on personal projects and collaborations, though usually edit in seclusion.

i find myself overwhelmed by the increase in demand for new content to continuously and relentlessly refresh itself each second with each click. for myself, there has been less and less expectation for new content, and more emphasis in genuine moments.

after spending the long holiday weekend really hunkering down on my new images, i'm finding that electric sense of discovery again. so much so that i wish to share with you all a few of these new images as i remap my site.

mostly portraits, i think it's been clear for a while that in all the arts of work i find myself doing, it's the subject of the human that i gravitate towards. we're so strange and lovely, curious, devious and filled with secrets.

the beautiful part of rediscovering myself in my own work, is that it bestows great strength and confidence that i have been able to maintain a persistence of vision, and having fun at the same time.

so please enjoy some of my new 120 work for the next couple weeks as i muss around with the behind-the-scenes of my site. it'll be less revamp or broad stroke, and more culling, editing, and refining.

thank you so much for your continued support.

c. bay

tonight's homework:

if you find yourself unable to sleep at three in the morning due to humidity, a racing mind, and site-mapping, make sure to drink plenty of water, stretch your body, and allow yourself to catch up to your synapses. amazing things are always afoot, and we're all eager to share in them.

---

 

" we have an idea "

---

a true collaboration doesn't necessarily require a time restriction. some of my more open-ended collars have been the most fruitful, the most rewarding.

the evolution of an idea, the refinement process, bouts of persistence & procrastination, the lack of ego yet with a specific intention; these are the ingredients for something successful. especially in those projects which evolve from something so small, so casual, we find ourselves thriving and whirling through a vortex of a creative life.

though life will tromp on with it's many soothing caresses and thorny briars in equal measure, through distances between both in geolocation and time, through all the probability that we will not come together, we make a concerted attempt to be true to a vision.

and in the end, we find ourselves newly made each time.

tonight's homework:

have a belief in the process, remain honest with yourself and your potential, and then seek out to redefine the parameters of your output. there are diamonds there just beneath the topsoil.

---

 

 

" outdoor naps & other revelations "

---

on the first of every first of whatever, it is always a good time to clean your room, mind, body, soul, apartment, garden, house, relationships, dress shoes, browser history.

an overcast day can at times lead to great balcony hangs.

binge-watching star trek episodes is a great peripheral activity to editing photos.

drinking full glasses of clear clean water is really refreshing in a humid environment.

if someone needs help, attempt to put their needs before yours; you can always not do so many things later.

if you see items that already exist in the world, there is always no immediate rush to need to purchase them at 3am online. sleep, dream up, save that money until you can adequately discern between new owner's glee and potential buyer's remorse.

hammocks are perfect products for the transition from standing to dreamland.

what we may fear the most can drive us inward, or help us to overcome, and in some instances heal.

ice cream is a decent choice for dinner, but you may have to brace yourself for potential nightmares.

realizing that you must pay your rent is disheartening, but the fact that you can afford it makes up for the massive dip in your accounts.

putting your friend & family's needs before your own are insanely rewarding, and also making time for your own desires is a good thing to schedule in as well.

even though clipping one's toenails increases in difficulty with age, nevertheless it is still a practice that is hygienic and necessary.

love and the promise of love is still pretty rad.

---

 

" early to rise "

---

clear open skies with the sort of clouds which seem to be water-colored on and simply linger overhead. a slight breeze from the west caresses, and everyone is up early today.

i slip off my shoes, then my socks, and my feet connect with the lush thick grasses, still wet from the cool overnight. i can feel the damp earth giving way to my flat wide feet, as my toes grip with each step.

taking this beauty of a morning in creates such a light, and such a lightness in my entire body. i'm not worried or anxious, not aching or rushed, not hesitant or somber.

a group of early risers embrace the air stretching their long lean limbs up-and-outwards, breathe out their stresses, and take in the universe.

---

 

" cyclical breathing "

---

everything as it always was, everything as it is now, everything as it will be.

learning from mistakes, making new ones, promising to never make them again.

finding you out there in the darkness, holding you close in the shadows, letting you go into the sun.

making a promise and keeping it, breaking a promise and regretting it, finding the words to say i'm sorry and mean it.

tonight's homework:

we are all imperfect, but that is no excuse to be sloppy or disrespectful. take care of each other, even the strangers amongst us.

---